I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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