The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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