Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
