Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
pop tarts are not kleenex
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize