Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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