Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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