I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
