There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
