So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
