Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
