The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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