dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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