Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize