Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
