i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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