Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
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