i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
