some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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