Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
