friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
