Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
