She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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