She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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