any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
