he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
There's always time for handjobs
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
