i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
