holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Randomize
