I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
