i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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