My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize