brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
