bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
