We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
