I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Your cock deserves a montage
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Randomize
