Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
