don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
