it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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