We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
