She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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