Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize