Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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