i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
