He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
