a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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