Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize