Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
