The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
