Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Randomize
