Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
