last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
