you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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